Have you ever felt the sting of betrayal, that sharp turn of events when trust is broken and your ideas are stolen? I've been there, walking through the fire of intellectual theft by someone I once respected—a professor who took my podcasting concept and claimed it as their own. Our latest episode is a raw and intimate reflection on that journey, where pain became the catalyst for growth and self-discovery. We weave through the lessons learned, emphasizing the importance of guarding our mental space and the power of self-worth in a world that can often seem filled with deception.
Joining me is a dear friend, whose own story of resilience in the face of duplicity serves as a beacon of hope. Together, we celebrate the unbreakable bonds of love and support, acknowledging the true wealth found in our relationships. We discuss how to maintain our integrity amidst life's challenges, and why recognizing the priceless nature of kindness, gratitude, and self-love is essential. Listen in as we honor the enduring human spirit, sharing insights on how to emerge from the shadows of betrayal with grace and strength, bound by the love that holds us together even in our darkest hours.
Have you ever felt the sting of betrayal, that sharp turn of events when trust is broken and your ideas are stolen? I've been there, walking through the fire of intellectual theft by someone I once respected—a professor who took my podcasting concept and claimed it as their own. Our latest episode is a raw and intimate reflection on that journey, where pain became the catalyst for growth and self-discovery. We weave through the lessons learned, emphasizing the importance of guarding our mental space and the power of self-worth in a world that can often seem filled with deception.
Joining me is a dear friend, whose own story of resilience in the face of duplicity serves as a beacon of hope. Together, we celebrate the unbreakable bonds of love and support, acknowledging the true wealth found in our relationships. We discuss how to maintain our integrity amidst life's challenges, and why recognizing the priceless nature of kindness, gratitude, and self-love is essential. Listen in as we honor the enduring human spirit, sharing insights on how to emerge from the shadows of betrayal with grace and strength, bound by the love that holds us together even in our darkest hours.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Take a breath, let's dive in. Hello and welcome to the Magnificent Ones podcast, where the motto is let's talk about everything, and I truly do love talking about everything. You know tonight's topic is about betrayal and how it comes in many forms. But before we get into the topic, I would like to just take a moment to say thank you. Thank you for joining in, thank you for listening and if you're a first time, you know a listener, you know welcome.
Speaker 1:
This channel isn't what it is without you guys tuning in and I'm very honored to have experienced the growth that I have and I'm so grateful and I look forward to see where this year takes. You know, being in the third quarter of the year, I feel so fulfilled I truly do and this program wouldn't be what it is without you know all the feedback, whether it's criticism or just a congratulatory, you know conversation or comment. I just want to say thank you sincerely and as the channel grows, you know I look forward to seeing where this journey takes me and takes you all as well. It is a privilege to be able to have an idea in your head and to watch that idea come to life, to materialize. You know, who would have thought a year ago that you know things would be going as it is right now? But the fact is it is, and it's a testament to both hard work, to the people who contribute, you know, whether it's it's Olocron productions that makes the music in the background, you know, or people who help with research and so many other things, or the inspiration from the conversations that I have in real life. This journey is not a journey without all of you, and it would not be good of me to not take this time to say thank you, because without you all, there is no me in this space, and so I have to always have the attitude of gratitude and to always say thank you when the moment presents itself. So this is me taking my breath, taking a deep dive into saying thank you and just continue. Thank you for your continued support. You know you don't have to spend your mornings listening, or evenings or what have you listening to my podcast. There's thousands of other podcasts, and so the fact that you take the time wherever, in whatever 20 countries or 300 in something cities that you all are hailing from, you take the moment to consciously or stumble upon my podcast and you continue to listen, and so, for me, 20 countries is a very big deal. So, thank you.
Speaker 1:
And, you know, let's truly take a breath and dive in. Let's talk about this conventional topic of betrayal in an unconventional way, and I'll share my personal experience with the topic as well, as you know some things that I've studied and learned throughout the years. So let's dive in, guys and, as always, be magnificent. You know, betrayal is such a hard topic to cover because it's one of those things where I don't know if I wanted to take a more analytical approach or a more feelings-based approach to this episode. So maybe I'm trying to find the balance between the two.
Speaker 1:
I'm conflicted in that way, and so I want to start off with forms of betrayal, and the first thing that came to mind was betrayal of confidence. You know there's people out there sometimes that will. You tell them things about yourself. You tell them things about yourself. Maybe you confide in them your insecurities and then all of your weaknesses, only to have them use that against you in your moment of weakness, and maybe they use that as a means to manipulate you or what have you. But you know, I've seen it. I haven't had that experience personally, but I've seen it happen to other people growing up and I never understood it on either ends, because a lot of times in those toxic relationships, both parties remain in that relationship, whether it's a friendship or a romantic, you know relationship, and so and I, like I said, I haven't directly dealt with that, but I wanted to go into it in any way because it's still important and I've had a close encounter with that personally, and it was with podcasting.
Speaker 1:
Ironically, there was a professor that I was working with and I wanted to get a podcast up and going, and I had an idea that I wanted to do and this professor decided to take my podcasting idea and run with it and did not, you know, tell me that they were doing this or that they were going to start a you know another podcasting, you know program, and so they completely stole, like my notes, everything, and you know, didn't say anything to me about it and you know they built up a catalog of all of our conversations and my ideas and how I wanted to execute the podcast. And, long story short, when you're the original creator of an idea, whether it's art, literature, you can always create more ideas regardless, which is good, because you didn't steal those ideas, they're yours. And so for this individual to take my idea they didn't necessarily and my actual work itself they didn't know what thoughts I had in my head, because we didn't talk about the thoughts of hey, I could see this being a potential problem down the line, you know, because it was usury. Someone saw an opportunity to take something and they did, and that happens in life, and I decided that I was never going to confront this person about it. And the reason being is because I was using this person as my research guinea pig to see the pitfalls in my ideas, the holes in my ideas, and I got to watch it play out in real time. It did sting knowing that this person did lie to me and did steal my work, but at the end of the day, I could always prove that the person stole my work. But I did not want to stake my reputation on an idea that was not fully flushed out or fully know how things would play out, and so this person provided me with live data of what was wrong with my ideas, as well as the execution. So I learned how not to do certain things, how not to say certain things, how to phrase things so that I could engage in a way in which, no matter what demographic you are, there's something here for you. So that's how I handled that.
Speaker 1:
And you'll notice, a constant theme in my life is that a lot of times, unless someone is being an immediate danger to myself or those around me, I don't act on emotion. So I do pretend like I don't know that someone screwed me over or that I don't know that what's going on. But I like to pretend that I'm ignorant in that way, because the amount of energy that I have to pour into fighting someone or arguing someone to me it's not worth it. It's a headache. I have better things to do with my time. So I never really engage things like that. You know it doesn't really lead anyone in a way that is beneficial to anyone in the end. So for me, confrontation has to, is probably will take on more of a physical form, in that I have to defend myself in a physical manner. And so long as I don't have to defend myself in a physical manner, because I'll handle that right, then and there then it's okay to just let the person steal because at the end of the day, you know there's not much to say, you know, there's the person is who they are, you know, and that doesn't need an explanation. If someone made a decision to betray you, you know, you don't truly need an explanation as to why they just betrayed you, you know, and to me the why isn't really important, it's just the fact that they did what they did, you know. With that being said, you know, I'd like to talk about just deception and misleading. You know, like there's people out there that they just want to see chaos and they don't care who pays the price for that chaos.
Speaker 1:
I remember, a years ago, I had, you know, a neighbor of mine, you know, and we became really, really good friends and this was also around the time that it started dating my wife. And you know, I didn't realize at the time that he, you know, he hated my wife, you know, or my girlfriend at the time, and he kind of felt that my wife was taking his in his place because we had this routine where we hung out every single day and that became, hey, man, sorry, we can't hang out today, I'm going on a date, you know, and so I guess, and my parents were going through divorce at the time simultaneously, and I canceled on a date with my girlfriend, which is my wife at the time, and I canceled on his birthday party because, you know, just a lot of things were going on at once and so, you know, he used that as an opportunity to try to create a wedge between, you know, my girlfriend and I. And he said to me he's like hey, man, you know, your girlfriend came to my party and he came with another guy and what have you. And because he's my really, really good friend, I could not even fathom that he would lie. And you know, and it was, it was a lie. And so I literally did not speak to my girlfriend you know, I guess ex-girlfriend for an entire year because of that entire debacle. And you know, I never confronted him about it and I told my wife, I said there's no need for me to confront him about it because every day that we're together it's him wondering if you know, if we like talked about it or hashed things out, you know, or if we like found out that it was him, you know, and he gets to live into that prism. I never confronted him about it and she never confronted him about it Because, again, he knew what he did and, regardless of his reasoning, he still did something that was gonna cause harm to both of us and he did so.
Speaker 1:
I don't need an explanation, I don't need an apology. It's just that once you cross a certain line, you know we just move on and you no longer. I mourn the loss of that friendship, but I don't dwell on it and I just keep moving forward. And I think a lot of people can learn from that is that when someone doesn't have your best interests at heart, you don't need to know why. You know sometimes it's okay to just move on and move forward.
Speaker 1:
And the closure isn't you're never gonna get the closure from the person's words. You get the closure from accepting the situation for what it is and moving on. The processing of that information, the processing of the loss of that friendship, is your closure. That's the truth. Time does heal wounds and each date hurts a little less.
Speaker 1:
But you can't do that if you're constantly, you know, fighting with a person for an answer that they may not even give you, the true, the answer that you want, and that's the thing. The answer that you want isn't the answer that you're going to get in most situations, because the answer that we want, that's our ego talking the. It was an accident, it won't happen again. That's our ego that wants to hear that. And that's that's just what it is. If you take your ego out of the situation as well, you learn that sometimes you just walk away because something just isn't for you. Not everything is for us.
Speaker 1:
You know, I recall a great quote. It said that not everyone you fight is your enemy and not everyone that you love is your friend. And that quote it I think. I don't remember, I think it might have been Mike Tyson, that that's that said that and it's something that rings in my head whenever I experience certain things and I and I'm like, okay, it's one of those situations where this person that's my enemy. Yes, we're, we're, we're competing against each other, but we're not enemies, we're just, it's just competition. And there's the man I love you and that person is the one stabbing me in the back the entire time. I have to move forward and and just accept it.
Speaker 1:
Like I said, I'm more in the loss of that friendship, Because it's all that we can do. You know, like we can't control the past, we can't control time, we can't even control our emotions. In our emotions they fluctuate. But what we can't control is how we handle the situation. What can we logically handle or emotionally handle? What can we actually do? Walking away is something you can walk away from a relationship that's toxic. You can walk away from a friendship that is manipulative in nature. You can walk away from toxic. It sucks because sometimes it's all any of us know.
Speaker 1:
You know, I was thinking about a concept the other day that really had my mind blown, which was sometimes you could come from the perfect home, a perfectly loving home, and that perfectly loving home may not prepare you for the world that's actually out there the doggy dog, the, the back stabbing, the, the slandering of, of, of people's character and name. You know, because in a loving home maybe you know people. You know if you're religious, then you're, you're, you're, you're taught turn the other cheek or you don't know what gossip is. You've read about it in a book, you've seen it in TV shows, but you know your family isn't that. You go out into the world and you learn how nasty people can be and it's like you're just not prepared for that.
Speaker 1:
I was that kid, I, I, you know I was not prepared for the world and I mean I had a stable, you know family until my parents, you know, divorced and whatnot. And the divorce while I was in college. So I was an adult, so I had stability, I had love, I had attention, affection, I could communicate anything that I wanted with my parents, I could talk to my parents, and because I could do those things, it made me very trusting of the world. So if perfect example would be when I was younger, if someone was like, hey, I need money, I would assume that anytime someone asked me for money, it was always like a truthful situation, like it was they truly needed the money for X, y, z or what have you. And when you come to that point where you realize that not everyone's being honest with you, you're like there's no way. This person said that their parents were in the hospital and so they needed to borrow some money. And then you find out that it's a lie and the person really just wanted to buy tickets for a concert or something and you would have given them money to them anyway. But you have to learn that lesson, and so the life taught me a lot of lessons about betrayal, because I didn't have to deal with those situations, I didn't have to deal with that kind of negativity, but I had to gain the experience in the real world of having gone through it and it sucked. But at the same time, I'm happy because now I get to talk about it in a podcast years later or what have you.
Speaker 1:
One of the things that I'm personally working on now is learning that, even though these situations take place, I don't have to allow it, because, even if I don't necessarily say something to the individual that does something against me, I don't want it to occupy my mental real estate. I don't want it to impede my thoughts and my positivity in how I flow in my life and navigate my daily situations. That's what I'm working on right now, because I mean, whether it's professionally, of course there's people who tried to create roadblocks for you, and that's just the reality of things and I've had to learn this. Of course there's people that's gonna take credit for your work. These things happen and I've learned that what is mine is mine, and those are things that no one can take away for me. That's something that I a little model that I've been working on. I think that would go really well on a shirt.
Speaker 1:
What is mine is mine. You can steal my idea, but at the end of the day, it's my idea, it is my brainchild and as such, you can only talk about it in so many ways until it's revealed that that's not yours. That just is what it is, and so if I were to take the time and energy to fight every battle of betrayal, I wouldn't have energy left to be standing tall. I'd be depleted. Let's just face it. Staying up late night after night with small children that don't like to sleep sometimes I don't have the energy for that and I'm not gonna invest energy into negativity. The world already has enough chaos and negativity and I don't wanna contribute to it. It's just not my thing.
Speaker 1:
But through it all, I feel the worst form of betrayal that exists is the betrayal of yourself, is when you know who you are and eventually you let the noise get to you, you let the sound start becoming your reality. When you lie to yourself and say you know what? I'm not good enough, I'm not pretty enough, I'm not handsome enough Can you tell yourself those things, you're betraying yourself. You know I've seen this just one too many times in the past couple of months. You know, I see individuals that are extremely intelligent and I hear them calling themselves stupid. I see pretty people that are saying that you know they wish they could change this about themselves and that about themselves, and not realizing that they're perfect just the way they are. And when you keep lying to yourself, you know that is truly betraying yourself. You stop seeing reality, you stop seeing you and you stop seeing, like, what you really have in front of you.
Speaker 1:
And there's another quote that I heard a long time ago and this was the perspective I got from it, and the quote was you know, while you're chasing getting a bigger home, there's a person that just wants a home. You know, while you're throwing your food away, there's a person that just wishes they could eat. Keeping up with the Joneses is you're lying to yourself. It is you betraying yourself that you forget to just appreciate small things in life. A house is not a home. Right, that's something that's so profound. Just because you have a house, it doesn't mean you have people occupying that space. That makes you feel welcome. It doesn't mean you get to lay your burdens at the door and have peace, but yet maybe you go into the house and you're just going to be a little bit more comfortable, but yet maybe you go into some run down shack and you get peace there because the company that you have, some things truly are priceless. Kindness is priceless, loving yourself is priceless, and so remember that you're amazing. Remember that you have something to offer. Don't feed into the noise, don't let the sounds of negativity drown out how truly special you are.
Speaker 1:
Ultimately, the person that inspired this episode is a dear friend of mine, whom I love wholeheartedly, and she's taught me so much about strength and resilience and bouncing back after being betrayed. Strength like that is something that I strive for, and I hope that she knows that she's made me a better person. I hope that she knows that she truly is just more than amazing and she's my hero, because betrayal sucks and she's the epitome of the saying that goes the world is held together by the love of a few good people, and I'm happy to say that the love that she gives is part of the reason why the world goes around and around and around. I'm truly blessed every time I think about the people that I have in my life and that I have the things that money can't buy and that makes me wealthy. The love that I have makes me wealthy, the joy that I feel in my heart and soul makes me wealthy. The amazing relationships I have with the people that I have makes me wealthy Because those things are priceless, and you all are priceless as well, and I hope that you find that thing that makes you never betray yourself.
Speaker 1:
May you see who you really are and your gifts in every way. So thank you, thank you all for being magnificent and stay true to who you are, even in the moments where you can't possibly see the light or you can't see the calm after the storm. Sometimes there's a calm before the storm, but there's also a calm after as well. Just know that, no matter what season in life you're in, it's a season, so it changes and there's a season for you, even if you can't see it yet. If you enjoyed today's content, please like and subscribe for more.