Unseen Cries for Help: Decoding Conversations

Ever found yourself in an intense exchange of philosophies around a crackling bonfire, only to realize later that you were missing the silent cries for help hidden in the discourse? That's what happened years ago with a dear friend. A profound conversation about reality, societal 'drugs' like caffeine, sugar, alcohol, and the pursuit of fleeting highs, was actually a testament to his inner turmoil. Our instinct to win debates often blinds us from truly understanding the essence behind a speaker's words. Let's explore that further, and also, how writing melancholic literature can help us navigate the labyrinth of our emotions.

Life is a confluence of joy and sorrow, trials and triumphs. But can hardship truly shape us into better versions of ourselves? Can pain actually be a stepping stone to limitless heights? It's difficult to believe, especially while struggling in the depths of despair. But, the dawn of hope is inevitable, offering a promise that is potent enough to endure the darkest nights. Join us as we delve into life's turbulent yet transformative journey, and discover how suffering can eventually lead to strength and growth.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Magnificent, magnificent, magnificent, magnificent. Hello, magnificent ones. Tonight's a little bit different. I thought it would be a great idea to share a story and share something a little positive at the end of that story. So years ago I would often have, you know, bonfires when I lived at home with my parents and my friends would come over and we'd have these deep philosophical conversations. And I remember one night in particular, like it was, so vivid.

Speaker 1: 0:46

I was wearing this white shirt, these green pants and, you know, these boots and it was fall. And you know, at this point it was close to being two o'clock in the morning. My friend looks at me and he says, oakley, everyone is living a lie and everyone's doing drugs. And I said, well, I'm not doing drugs and I'm not living a lie. And he says BS. And we began this fierce debate. And normally when someone else gets worked up, I don't get worked up. But you know, my friend, whom I love dearly, was saying that everyone was living a lie and everyone was on drugs and whatnot, and my goal was to prove him wrong. So, of course, you know, when we begin to debate, at the time I couldn't see what he was trying to say and he couldn't see what I was trying to say, but I will say it now that, even though he didn't know it, like he actually won, I was the one that lost the debate. Like I said, I won the debate but in terms of the truth of the conversation, like he was right and I was wrong, I was just better equipped to argue because at the time, you know I often played the part of a troll. You know I love trolling. Long story short.

Speaker 1: 2:33

His point was, he said Do you drink coffee? I said yeah, yeah, I drink coffee, because, okay, caffeine is a drug. I was like okay. He said you know, do you eat sugar? I was like not really you guys. Well, even if you don't eat sugar, well you know that knowingly. Well, sugar is a drug. You can have a sugar addiction. A lot of people have sugar addictions and they don't know they have a sugar addiction. I was like you know, do you drink? You know, beer, bourbon, whiskey or whatever? And I said yeah, because, well, alcohol is a drug. And so you know all valid points and those are all truthful statements. So, by that definition, everyone does drugs, right, I couldn't really see the point that he was trying to get to, but at the time.

Speaker 1: 3:30

But in the grand scheme of everything, what he was trying to communicate was that he wasn't happy and that sugar, the high doesn't last very long. Caffeine, it wears off. You know, you can drink as much as you want but, like the song says, the bottom of the bottle is always dry. And I just wasn't at that life or that point in life where I could see that truth. But now I can.

Speaker 1: 4:07

At that moment it forced me to look inward and sometimes, you know, we look at mere facts and you know arguing, you know talking points, but we're not necessarily looking at the intent of another person's words and what they're trying to communicate. And this friend of mine is trying to communicate that he is not happy. And I am being a bad communicator because I'm not listening. I'm hearing his words but I'm not listening. And because I'm not listening, how can I be empathetic to what he's trying to communicate? I can't, because I haven't opened up myself to be receptive to the message that was being given to me.

Speaker 1: 5:00

I remember a quote that I saw a long time ago. In the quote read if you aim for the moon, you miss the stars. The moon is this one object that's forever fixed in the night sky and the stars. Even though they're not infinite, you know. They seem like you could never possibly count all of them, which you really can't but my point is that there's just so many of them and they're all beautiful and unique in their own way, and if we become hyper-fixed on one thing, we miss so many other things. Human connection and the ability to understand another human being and to be understood by others is very vital to our existence.

Speaker 1: 5:43

Imagine if no one understood you. You know you were speaking a foreign language. You'd feel like you're a foreign land. You were in a foreign land, and it's not that you're elsewhere. You'd feel like you're in a foreign land in your own home. What if your sister, brother, mother, father, grandfather didn't understand what you were saying? How would you develop in life knowing that you were never understood and you could not be understood because you couldn't speak the language and your words never truly connected with those people?

Speaker 1: 6:25

Are you going to be a happy person in life or are you going to be a depressed person? I don't know what that's like. That was not my upbringing, but that's what I got from that interaction. I know I have gained perspective because now I can look for these things and I remember thinking about writing and how much I love writing. And I can never write anything when I'm happy.

Speaker 1: 6:55

You know I can't write happy poems. I don't know why I can't do that. It's just never been something that I've ever even attempted to do. My brain just tells me stop, don't do it. And I always listen. And so I've always just thrive in this melancholic type of literature and writing, because the dark things, the gray things, there's a beauty in those things too, right, there's a beauty in overcoming something. There's a beauty in understanding that if you're in this dark place right now, that light may come tomorrow. The sun will rise, and that should be. The focus is that the sun will rise. Let the sun be one of the things that you set your gaze on, because it's also a star in the sky, but it's also not the only star in the sky. So this is the part of the podcast that I said that I wanted to share something, and this is the second part. So the first part was the story and the second part is this In the shadows of your sorrow's night, where heavy hearts and tear drops fall, remember my friend, the dawn is bright, for in each heart there is a resilient call.

Speaker 1: 8:20

When clouds obscure your hopeful view and doubts like thunder echo loud, know that skies will also be blue once more. You'll soon break through a hopeful shroud, though grief may hold your spirit tight and trials test your strength, and will Hold on dear soul with all your might, for growth emerges from the still like seeds that struggle neath the earth to reach towards the vibrant sky. You're paying a seed of wondrous worth and bear strength within as days go by. For life's tapestry, a masterpiece is woven, with both joy and pain in each thread, a story to release a symphony of loss and gain. Embrace the storms, for they shall pass, and sculpt a skull that's strong and true. The sun will rise on greener grass, with brighter days awaiting you. So when you're lost in darkest night and hope seem like a distant star, remember you possess the might to heal and rise, no matter how far. Through valleys low and mountain high, you'll journey on withheld, with head held high, for deep within, a fire shall fly, guiding you towards boundless sky, living strength that lies within the power to mend and to renew. With open hearts, let's all begin to see the dawn of hope that will one day shine through.

Speaker 1: 10:14

I'm not a poet, I just felt kind of Shakespearean slash, edgar Allan Poe-ish, just wanted to share that. That's why I said this one would be a little bit different. Maybe I'll be inspired to write something, who knows? But thank you, magnificent ones, for being magnificent, and your days won't always be perfect. The rain falls because the grass needs to grow, and the storm may be brutal and it may be rough, but the storm is also necessary because that is growth.

Speaker 1: 10:58

We can't live in discomfort, because if we did, why would we go to the gym? You know we work out and when we're lifting weights, the first time it hurts, it sucks. But you know what happens your recovery time becomes shorter and shorter and shorter. So then it hurts less and less and less. The more frequently you do it, it becomes normal. It's like breathing or walking. It becomes a part of who you are. So if you think that nothing bad is ever going to happen to you in this life, then you are sadly mistaken. Bad things will always happen, but the bad things are what define the person that you'll become. The bad things tell you that, hey, you're ready for this one and you're ready for the next one. The bad things reveal who you are. You know the cliches that diamonds are formed under pressure. Well, that's an oversimplification. I say that people are diamonds and they reveal who they really are because the pressure they put on themselves Force yourself to grow and do youryou matter, your thoughts matter, your opinions matter, and that's real.